Leonard Grover

This morning it is snowing–is this the “lamb” that March is suppose to go out with? I realized that for someone who doesn’t like snow, I had no problem with this spring snowstorm, because I have confidence that the snow will not last long in the face of the coming warmth of spring.
I then thought about the emotional storms that we all face and the fact that it is easier to face a trials if we have confidence that they too will be, “but a small moment”. We each have access to a shield of confidence to hold up against despair that comes with trials–that shield is God’s promise that warmth of spring is coming and that we can weather our storms if we look and live by His words.

“There is a great risk in justifying what we do individually and professionally on the basis of what is ‘legal’ rather than what is ‘right.’ In so doing, we put our very souls at risk. The philosophy that what is legal is also right will rob us of what is highest and best in our nature. What conduct is actually legal is, in many instances, way below the standards of a civilized society and light years below the teachings of the Christ. If you accept what is legal as your standard of personal or professional conduct, you will deny yourself of that which is truly noble in your personal dignity and worth” President James E. Faust (“Be Healers,” Clark Memorandum, spring 2003, 3).
Leonard’s thought on this topic: When faced with ethical questions I have tried to ask myself this question: “If everyone envolved in this matter knew all the facts, that I know, would I be comfortable facing them and answering their questions about what I did and didnt’ do?” If I feel uncomforable with the answer then I know I may be on ethical thin ice.

I was impressed this week as I read about our faithful Jewish brothers and sister who battle opposition daily to be able to stand and pray at the wall of a former temple of God in Jerusalem. Then later in the week I heard a TV show about our Moslim brothers and sister who fast 3 straight days (while the sun is up) at Passover to celebrate Moses’ deliverance from Egypt. Then this morning I heard Gerald Lund in a talk tell a incident I have not heard from church history: “On September 25, 1846, Brigham Young, camped at Winter Quarters, received word about the Battle of Nauvoo and the final expulsion of the poverty-stricken Saints. The last remnant had been forced to leave the city—the poor, the widowed, and the orphans who were now camped in eastern Iowa on the banks of the Mississippi. Upon learning of their situation, and in spite of the desperate straits of the Saints who had just crossed Iowa and were camped on the banks of the Missouri River, Brigham Young gathered together the priesthood brethren and said: ‘The poor brethren and sisters, the widows and orphans, sick and destitute, are now lying on the west bank of the Mississippi, waiting for teams and wagons and means to remove them. Now is the time for labor. Let the fire of the covenant, which you made in the house of the Lord burn in your hearts like flame unquenchable.’ President Young then asked for those who had wagons and were able to cross Iowa to assist the destitute in joining the main body of the Saints. Within a few days, almost ‘a hundred wagons were moving east to rescue the poor.’”
My thought: we need to keep our fire of the covenant buring like an unquenchable flame so we can help in the “rescue missions” that we are called to each day.

Mark Matheson sent me this quote that sheds light on our inner dialog that we sometimes use to deceive ourseleves:
“Oscar Wilde said he could resist anything but temptation. But doing something you know you shouldn’t is easier if you can convince yourself that this will be the last time you indulge, that you won’t do it again. So we convince ourselves that since we’ll be strong in the future, we can still indulge today. Whether it’s smoking, eating too much or going to the pub instead of the gym, we delude ourselves into thinking that we will take the more difficult path next time.
A few years ago, two economists actually looked at the issue using gym membership data. They found that in a club in which non-members could pay a no-strings fee of $10 per visit, people preferred to pay the $70 per month for unlimited access. And since members only attended 4.3 times a month on average, they ended up paying an average $17 per visit. The authors concluded this to be clear evidence of ‘overconfidence about future self control.’ …
But at root, such poor decision-making is a consequence of our fundamental underestimation today of the discipline and even courage we will require in the future.”

Dylan Grice, Société Générale

I am really enjoying the process of blogging. First it causes me to work through thoughts and capture them in written words rather than just having them bounce around in my brain. Then your comments help me rethink different aspects of the thoughts I have posted. Thanks for your comments in the thought refinement process.
This week I had a talk with Jonny that lead to this thought: If we look at all that we possess, our time, talents, knowledge, skills etc., as “water” then we see them as finite resources. When we share any of these things with others, we are giving up a precious cup of water from our limited possession buckets–fear may be in the back of our minds that we may not have enough water for ourselves . But if we look at all that we possess as belonging to God, and he has only made us stewards over them, then maybe we can see that these possessions are really “fire” which is never dimished when it is shared with another. Fire only mutiplies when it is shared. So it is with our time, talents, skills and resources if we have an abundant perspective we are willing to share them because we know that they will be multipled!

We have all heard the warning, “Don’t get your hopes up”, many times in our lives. I got a new insight into this saying yesterday. Valory attended a women’s conference and Amanda Dickson a radio host spoke about hope. Her message was: people warn us about getting our hopes up to save us from disappointments. Do we hurt ourselves more by keeping our hopes low, instead of setting them high and chasing our dreams and taking the risk that we will meet some disappointments as a result? Is the like the analogy that a sailing ship reaches none of its destinations if it never leaves the safety to the harbor? How high are you setting your hopes?

I attended a seminar yesterday and the speaker said, “If insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result, then futility is knowing the definition of “insanity” and not doing anything different.”

Do you get frustrated with yourself when you forget something? Try laughing. I was recently in a training meeting with Elder Robert Hales, in the middle of his talk he forgot the point he was making. He stopped and brought laughter to the meeting by saying, “The reason we forget things as we get older is so that we can die with a clear conscience.”

I have often thought if you could interview everyone in the world and asked them what they wanted, that all their answers may at first sound very different, but at their core you would find one descriptive word of emotion: JOY.
This morning I was impressed with two short sentences that take the universality of seeking joy, across the almost 6,000 years of human history on this earth–and tells us the source of joy and it opposite, misery.
“At the heart of misery from the days of Adam until today, you will find the love of wrong things. And at the heart of joy, you will find the love of good things.”
President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

This past week I have read a book titled, “Learned Optimism” by Martin Seligman a professor at University of Pennsylvania. Seligman has spent his entire professional life working studying “helplessness” and ways to enlarge personal control. He, and the researchers he has worked with, have been able to identify and test out specific skills that if taught to children before puberty, but late enough that they can think about thinking, tends to “immunize” the children to deal more effectively with the inevitable adversity of setbacks and failure they will have to face. The results in the lives of the children (monitored over 10+ years) that have received this training versus those who have not received the training are very impressive: 50% lower rates of depression symptoms in the children immunized with the skills. Other results may be more productive work lives, and better health.
The core of this skill training is simple: personal control and emotional stability are tied to what we think and say to ourselves when we face setbacks. Those who have the inner dialog when facing adversity that say, “this is temporary, this is specific to one area of my life and this setback is external to me” have measurably more resilience to get over the setback and move on with productive lives. While individuals that have the opposite inner dialog, “This setback is permanent, pervasive (it impacts all areas of my life) and personal (internal)” cause feelings of helplessness and depression.
I good news that if we beyond puberty can learn these skills and improve our inner dialog to deal more effectively with set back, hence the title of the book, learned optimism. There are a number of test in the book to help you see where you are at in terms of your inner dialog. It was very interesting to see the areas I need to work on in my inner dialog. Check out the book–or give it to someone you know who may be struggling we sizable personal set backs in their live.